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These are light articles about finding the humor in life.
“How much crap can you carry in your wallet?”
This is a question frequently asked by my husband when I peel out my wallet at the checkout counter.
“I can’t help that it all falls out. I have about a million of these reward cards, my credit cards, my license, my receipts, and my money?”
That is the point where he just gives me a very inquisitive look like I’m nuts.
Mom’s look for a deal and you can’t always get a deal if you don’t have your card. At CVS the other day I made a purchase and when I got my register tape it was a mile long and had some decent coupons. One of them was for 25% off my entire CVS purchase. Now that isn’t something you see every day.
When my friend Kristin from EverydaySolutions.com and I were together working on a book on how a mom can organize her life, I asked her for a parenting advice on this sensitive topic. THIS is the brilliant thing she recommended.
What you do is you go to keyringthing.com. They will ask you for all of your reward card numbers and then consolidate them on one card, generating a bar code for each store, 3 on one side and 3 on the other. The best thing about it is how people freak out when I use it at the checkout. Yesterday I went to Costco.
“May I see your card please?”
I took out my keyringthing.com card .
“I’m sorry I need your Costco card.”
“This is my Costco card. Just try scanning the bar.”
When they did and it worked, they began calling everyone over to show off my card. They had never seen anything like it.
“Where did you get this?” one girl asked.
“You mean you don’t have to carry 6 different cards in your wallet? You just use this one card?” another chimed in.
Yup. No more bulk in the bulkhead. Just one little card that takes the place of SIX.
Visit keyringthing.com put in your membership numbers for other stores i.e.: Costco, BJ’s, Grocery stores, Staples, etc. I think it’s $5.95 for each card and put in 31957 under promo. They will give you 10% off and it will be one step towards simplifying your life.
My dad and my mother in law are in town this week , and no we didn’t plan on the matching outfits. They were kind enough to fly in from Florida for my son’s communion. I love the visit. The thing is that my family is very social. Ok cut to the chase, I have been partying for a week. Every day is an outing, a lunch (as seen here), a pizza party, a dinner here and a drink there. I’m not used to this retired lifestyle. I think I may need a detox and a good nap. If this is any indication of what my retirement years will be, I better get my rest now.
My tip for when your retired parents come to visit is to :
#1) Drink lots of water ahead of visit
#2) Lose about 5 pounds before they arrive.
#3) Clear the calendar.
#4) Get lots of rest.
#5) Be ready to see who your parents used to be before they had you.
An age old argument between my husband and I has been about the electric bill. Listen it isn’t that I don’t want to save money I just think at some point you have to let go. The other night I woke up to an empty bed and when my husband came in, he shared that he was up shutting off the lights the kids left on when they went to bed. I think it is universal for men. Checking the crack of the door for random breezes is not in the female DNA.
Most of the time the culprit is the kids. When we ask them WHY they can’t just exert a small bit of energy to flick a switch, they claim they just forget. Now we have instated a policy that if they “just forget” then we just forget their allowance which will be used toward the bill. It’s ongoing and as they are getting older there doesn’t seem to be a “light” at the end of the tunnel. I can remember being a kid and m parents saying that they were funding the electric company. So what’s the answer?
This may not be the answer but it helps. A friend of mine recommended cryptograms.com where I pay $75 and they in turn come in and rate my electric efficiency, showing us how to save money. Since $75 is the average cost of a TGI Friday dinner, we gave it a shot. What did we have to lose?
When they came they sectioned every single crack with tape that could have been causing air to escape from the house. My husband was in heaven. Then they proceeded to place a giant blower in the front door and gauge how much heat the house was retaining. It was like having Snoop Doggy Dog in my house. They checked appliances, fireplaces, doorways, windows, insulation and they even changed out the light bulbs with high efficiency bulbs, all for 75 bucks.
If you want, check it out. You can email them at cryipograms.com or call them at 1-888-403-3500. The problem is that the funded allowances to do this program are running out. I tried calling for my brother and they said “none available in that town.” Mention Wendy McGee and they will come out to your house or put you on the list if it isn’t available for the next time the funding comes around. It is money well spent.
Last night I had the pleasure of attending a small gathering in Greenwich CT hosted by LadiesWhoLaunch,not to be confused with Ladies Who Lunch, which is why I didn’t eat dinner before I went. It was held in a rather posh private women’s boutique on Greenwich Avenue, Carlilse Collection. If you were trying to find it you would walk by like I did 3 times, because apparently when you get that swanky you don’t use a sign. Kristin Van Ogtrop, the Editor at Real Simple magazine, was the guest speaker. The theme for the speech was “Life Balance.” That had my name all over it. I was looking to be inspired and needed balance beyond my new yoga handstand.
Kristin did a 9 point presentation that was very funny and wrote with much of the same humor that I share on my site.
#1) Sometimes Too Much Is Just Never Enough
Hey maybe some of us like to be busy.
#2) Train Yourself to Delegate Instead of Regulate
Apparently 55% of all women that were happy delegated at least 1x week to their spouse. NOW YOU ARE TALKING. I think I might be able to delegate garbage duty to get it rolling.
#3) If You Don’t Have A Thick Skin Learn To Heal Quickly
You can’t just dish it out, you need to learn not to be a baby and accept criticism.
#4) Don’t Exceed Your Personal Speed Limit
What speed limit?
#5) Know When to Kill The Messenger
I don’t remember this one but it sounds good.
#6) Memorize the 3 Phrases That Will Save Your LIfe
- “Is There A Shortcut For This?”
- “No”
- Too engrossed, didn’t write down 3.
#7) Don’t Let The Perfect Be The Enemy of The Good
- Are you at peace with your life choices?
- Are you a good mother?
- Are you a supportive friend?
Sometimes good at more is better than perfect at less. (Does that make sense?)
#8) Remember That The Road To Happiness Is Paved With Three Things
- Dry Skin Cream
- Black Pants That Fit
- 10 Recipes For Boneless Chicken Breasts
#9) Never Forget Your Own Zuzu Petals
If you have seen It’s A Wonderful Life” George Baily finds the Zuzu petals his daughter had given him from his daughter in his pocket. She wanted him to fix the flower for him. I think it is about knowing your own value.
Kristin shared humorous excerpts from her book Just Let Me Lie Down, about having a career and raising children- all in the same life, which were relatable and entertaining. She was also very humble and genuinely connected to her family of readers.
After writing for 9 years, I am still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. I looked up to Kristin and her accomplishments realizing what an effect her magazine as well as her own writing, has had on women all around the world. Looking back at being a columnist myself, I think about the voice of my readers.
“You make me laugh with stories like men and useless information, you make me cry with stories about parting with your kids baby clothes.”
What I realized is that reaching out to women, touching on a myriad of emotions, allowing others to understand that we are all one in the same , is what compels me to write. My dream at this point is to be able to take that to a larger audience. Could Real Simple be my audience?
Thank you Kristin. You have inspired me and I am going to move forward knowing that it is possible for a woman to have it all.
For more with Kristin visit her website at http://simplystated.realsimple.com/author/kristinvanogtrop/.
A day just for mothers is music to my ears. The sad thing is that Sunday is a day for me and when my family asks me what I want to do, I reply “I don’t know.” It’s too much pressure. My mind begins to spin and I start taking a mental tally in my head thinking about what my sons or daughters would enjoy.
When I lived abroad, one of the things that I missed the most was the every day outings with my mother. We could get lost for hours just poking around and having lunch. Every Saturday growing up would be our day to shop, hang out, cook together, or even just to clean.
Now that I am back , I try to find some time that I can share with mom. Impromptu I will call her and we will take off to Costco or for a bite for lunch. The other day we were on the South side of town and we looked at each other and announced almost in tandem
“Screw the diet, let’s go to Blackies for a hot dog.”
My car wheels squealed with delight as we made the left turn into the parking lot.
Inside, we sat at the old wooden bar. Exchanging glances, we knew the order;
3 hot dogs with their spicy relish
2 bags of chips
2 chocolate milks
We moseyed up to our stool, sat down, and waited in anticipation.
What hit me most that day was how much I cherished the little things we shared, Mom and I. There wasn’t extravagance in the outings but rather time together, trips to the market, and stops at the lunch counter.
Looking back, I realized why I couldn’t decide what I wanted to do for Mother’s day. I didn’t want to experience the extraordinary, I want to do ordinary things that make being with mom so special. Oh yeah, and maybe a nap.
Happy Mother’s Day to all my beautiful column readers.
I am now proud to say that I know what a Droid is and that I am a full fledge Droid user. It took me a while to get used to the idea that I didn’t I have a button that clearly stated “END” which could be dangerous if you are still talking and the person on the other end has yet to disconnect.
“I would rather get my foot caught in the door than go to my mother’s for dinner on Saturday.”
Suddenly you hear this random voice. ”Hello? Wendy, are you talking about me?”
“Just kidding?”
One of the nicest features of my Droid is the apps. For those who aren’t familiar, for a nominal fee like .99 you can download a feature to your phone that can change your life. You can create a custom Christmas list, create a GPS, you can get music, Kindles, organize task, grocery lists, and do all sorts of things. My family isn’t please because I spend half of my waking moments with my face in the keyboard thinking it is the greatest thing I have ever seen.
My personal favorite was an app that was a vault for all my passwords. They tell you not to keep the same passwords for everything but then again how am I supposed to remember 25 different passwords? I go to my Amazon account staring at the screen thinking that if I were to stare long enough, the password would magically appear. This feature was great because you put the URL address down and you put the passwords in. It doesn’t matter where you are, you can always get the important information to get into your account without having to think about it, or so I thought.
My only problem now is that now I can’t remember the password to the app with all my codes. Help! I’m looking for a better way to store this information or a medication that will increase the size of my brain. Hey maybe there is an app for that?!
I am on party overload. In the UK we hosted one party. We were invited every weekend to a different event at a much larger home, and I had a blast. Here with a house that is built for a party, here is my party list since I have returned:
- Superbowl party- Go Giants!
- My brothers birthday party
- My daughters Sixteenth Birthday Party- limo with girlfriends to New Haven pizza party and sleepover after
- My daughters’ Confirmation Party-
- Hosted guest from UK for one week
- PreEaster Party with out of town family – cooking baking, Easter Egg Hunt
- Easter Dinner ( made 10 Easter Baskets, leg of lamb and ham with trimmings)
- My Son’s 13th Birthday Party (Bronx Zoo and party after)
- Cohosted Baby shower (not at my house)
- Prom Pictures/After Prom Party- (barbecued at 1am for group of
- My Son’s First Communion Party- (Made 7 racks of ribs and 50 pieces of chicken)
I love having everyone here and I love my friends and family, however what I don’t love is the constant pressure of having a new deadline and other things in my life that have fallen short. Cabana Girl is retiring. She is tired and she wants to go anywhere BUT home.
Today my life is in limbo. My husband is deciding between two jobs, one which will take him across the country Monday through Friday, a hot smaller company that has tremendous potential. He would be running sales. The other is closer, much more stable, he would be running sales their as well. It is gambling for that big silicone valley payoff versus winning the race at a slow steady pace. I need slow and steady right now. There isn’t a price tag for having your husband closer to you.
US GARBAGE – EVERY WEEK
MY NEIGHBOR’S THIS MORNING
UK GARBAGE- EVERY OTHER WEEK
WHERE HAVE WE GONE WRONG?